How does a man raise a child?

Quote Originally Posted by A500DaBest
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These thoughts are in my head and heart for so long…one thing I don’t want to do is leave this world with these ideas or negative thoughts about Allah’s law or etc in fear I may end up in hellfire. I want to learn to clean the negative thoughts from myself and waswas of shaitan. Get it out in the open for the purpose of learning and cleaning my heart.

What Umm Uthmaan said I didn’t know until 8:26 AM today. I have being under the guise that the father’s role is only money. Where I get this? Sheikhs. Islamic scholars. Media. Society. Especially when we all take about mother’s right, etc more than even husband right…I start to even think that only women of higher standard and value and men have no value or significant role what so ever. This is why I am expressing what is in my heart…as a plea of help…guys help me clear these negative thoughts…help me clear these evil thoughts in my heart and point me out with the proper knowledge so I can have weapon and ammunition to clean my heart after the will of Allah (subhanahu wa talaa) and have a weapon against the shaitaan and his waswas. (It doesn’t help I am living in the West either, gynocentric female worshiping society.)

I believe these thoughts are dangerous and need to be destroyed. So I am coming here…starting with this as a starting base. I understood that the child obeys the mother over the father and the child listen to the mother over the father. So this is where I came in, if the child obeys the mother over the father how can the father raise the child?

I guess also child has a natural tendency towards the mother I believe. Islam is a package. Package that involves islamic parenting as well.
Once this is in, everything is Alhamdulilah.

the child obeys the mother because from young, they were always together.
as compared to the father who is always outside working. This is where the mother needs to explain to the child that the father is outside working hard for the family etc.
And the father has to show that despite working hard, he tried his best to spend time with the child.
“Listen to your father, he means well” this continuous words, and hopefully the child gets the idea.

If the father is doing something wrong, no good reason that the child to obey the father. Especially if the father oversteps the boundary.
Even so for those situation, Islam does not teach us to be rude to parents.
Things happen for a reason.

If the mother is giving good advice, doing the right things, giving proper islamic advise to the child.
If the child obeys more than the father, then i see no issues in that matter. There is a hadith mention that the prophet mention mothers 3 times. as opposed to father.
That shows the importance.

Don’t worry about it. InshaAllah this negative perceptions will go away.

REF: Islamic Parenting

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