My Dad is a controlling husband and father

One of the biggest problems that face Islamic families today is this abuse that exists with fathers and sometimes mothers, i have come accross SO many families that experience abuse by the father or mother or both , and there is something that kind of gave way for it

generations of us(those who come from Islamic backgrounds) we are taught from a very young age that respecting your father and mother is so important EVEN if they are kafir , that they must be respected and as the Quran says “Dont even say Uh” to them

so this idea is from generation to generation passed down that the parents can pretty much do what they want and get away with it and no matter what happens they are always right , like the idea that “Heaven is under your mothers feet” etc

and so many families like over 60% of them experience horrible parenting where the father is stubborn arrogant angry and just horrible towards everyone in the house, and not let anyone get a word in even when he is clearly wrong , and this leads to so many friction in the family and abuse unfortunately too

it really is an pandemic that for those who experience it feel like there is no way out , and usually end up praying and wishing their parents die or never return back so that they can somehow get away from them for ever

i have met SOO many families that suffer just outrageously in this regard and really we need to somehow put an end to it

i have met one family where the father is anti-hygiene , he doesnt like to wash or shower or change his clothes because he thinks its too expensive to shower every day or to wash your clothes every day or to wash yourself every day, and he doesnt like to use deodorant because he thinks its not natural , and for the family this causes chaos for the household , and nobody can stop him or do anything about it , he also collects rubbish when people have clean up days and throw their old stuff outside, he goes around collecting it and hoarding it in his house and backyard which for the family is just a nightmare

he also used to beat his wife and children but thank God that has stopped as he is now old and tired to do that, however his attitude about it hasnt changed he still thinks he has a right to do that when he isnt happy

also he attends mosque regularly , goes to friday prayers, listens to lectures, prays, fasts, doesnt do any of the greater sins like alcohol or adultery or anything like that, he is a legit Muslim in that regard, but his treatment of his family and household and personal hygiene and cleanliness is a nightmare for anyone that has to live near him or with him

anyway things like this happens to so many families its truly just sickening and nothing can be done about it, he wont listen to anyone and he rejects to talk with psychologists or local Imam or any such person to intervene about this issue

and again, nothing can be done about it

REF: Islamic Parenting

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